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JENNA'S STORY Learned Helplessness leads to Hoplessness Though identifying details, including her name, have been changed, the story is true. Jenna had watched helplessly growing up as her father drifted further from them. More often, for more days at a time he would sit in his study, lost in the past, his only company for days at a time had been bottles of vodka. She had wondered why she had not been able to make him happy. If only she had been smarter or prettier, if only she had been perfect.
As a young mother Jenna watched as her own children stood helpless in that same doorway, asking why their grandpa didn’t want to see their new toys. A familiar sense of hopelessness come over her and stayed with her for days and weeks at a time.
Emotionally Jenna was stuck, unable to help children to deal with it because she was back in the pain of her past, frozen and ashamed, not able to get out of the pain..
She wanted to scream, notice me. I’m here. I matter. She did not want her children to know what it felt like to not matter.
Not until Jenna was able to get back to the HERE & NOW was she able to reclaim her power of choice, her voice, and the knowledge that she does matter.
Only then could she make the decision to always plan to just stay for ten minutes in case her father was "unavailable". On the days when he was present and able to enjoy his grand children, then she stayed. She was able to make these choices only after she got out of the pain and out of the past and into the HERE & NOW.
You too can learn the seven simple steps to getting out of the pain and into the HERE & NOW. And then practice them, and practice them. You can do that much for yourself to see if it can work for you. I can be there by phone or in person, or on line by chat or email to support and guide, encourage and train you as you practice getting out of th pain. Click the "On Line Counseling" tab at the top left and follow the links to schedule a session.
Help is just a few clicks away. Follow the links and schedule the call. Learn the HERE & NOW Plan.
Stress can be managed, anger can be lessened,
children can behave better, and relationships can be fun again. Trauma can be resolved, healing can happen,
and people can move forward. Counseling can help.
Face to face, on the phone, or on line!
Helping people move forward.
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